If only the scientists didnt give up on inventing a time machine,how nice would that be?I would go back in time and fix everything.I would undo and redo whatever i've done wrong.
i'm really very tired.i'm exhausted .I can't go on anymore,i give up.Im not gonna try anymore,its draining all my energy away.Nothing is going right now,one problem after another.
And why dont i think before i speak?Thats my problem since forever.I always dont think before i speak and then end up getting myself into a whole lot of shit.If only i speak of the right things,i would be living my life off a lot happier.
This happened way too many times.This happened to my old friends, also to the new ones and even to my family.Just what the fck is wrong with me?Why can't i just think before i speak?I feel like im a bad person,a bad friend,a bad daughter and a bad grand daughter.I really dont know what to do now.I dont even know what i want.Can the world just end so that everything will just disappear?I dont wanna think and ponder or whatever shit anymore.Seriously feel like leaving this place,this country.Maybe my mother's idea of going over to Perth wasnt that bad actually...right?

I guess im gonna give myself a break before i start trying again.Im always the one trying.I dont have the guts to REALLY give up.Guess thats the nature of a Cancer.Seriously hate my star sign.

Then,up to here-